Thursday, May 29, 2008

"Private Collection"

WHY does it have to be "Private Collection"? And can I have some information as to WHO owns this "Private Collection"? So that I can make friends and SEE the painting? Anyway, just annoyed...share with the world man! It's the "Son of Man" by Rene Magritte...1964. You probably are most familiar with it from that little remake of "The Thomas Crowne Affair"....good ole Pierce Brosnan. Anyway, that's the only place you'll be seeing this sad. So....if you know who that "Private Collecter" is? Lemme I can put him/her/them on my Christmas Card list!!

"From Whence I Came"

I totally MUST go to bed before 1am tonight/day, but I must write this. This morning I came down to a note from my mom written on a paper towel...along with a dead head of lettuce and some stale rolls. The note said this...."After I mow we'll throw these out for your friends, so we can see where they are. Or MAYBE you can tear them into pieces and put it close to the house so you can lure them to be your pet." This of course in regards to my over-obsession with the groundhogs...see blog below. Anyway, this cracked me up....I mean almost fits of giggles. It launched me back to a conversation I had with Annie-with whom you should all be familiar with by now-but we were talking about the Flip-Flop party and how she couldn't come because of a tour, but how she really wanted to because she wanted to see "from whence I came". It was funny, and she said she just really wanted to see where I came peeps/cats/etc. note...from my mom...about helping me lure the groundhogs into "petdom" was so TOTALLY from whence I came! I mean this apple hasn't fall far from the tree....if I've fallen at all. So...if you think I'm haven't met my brother, father, or mother...cuz I have nothing on them. Anyway, I pulled the Hansel and Gretel on the groundhogs...and now I'm waiting......

Tuesday, May 27, 2008


So...this is a catch up....since I wasn't home for 2 months...and then I got to come home for a solid 6 days....and it was really great...and it's just great to be surrounded by love! And was said to me, by another near and dear, as they just went home to their family for a spell....that it was so nice to be around people you love and that love you right back. It is. And if you aren't the person that leaves and comes aware of the love you are surrounded by daily....cherish it. I feel like coming home is a recharge. I didn't get a Nintendo till I graduated from college...but on the N64...Mario could run through the heart for a recharge? I feel like that is what I do when I come home....topped up on love to go again! I LOVE being on the road....and I feel more at home away from home sometimes...but it is just so nice to come home and chill in love's company. So thanks...for those of you who love me-cuz I love you right back! And this picture? Excuse what I look like...I was coming off tour and it was 5 in the morning after a 1am bedtime...but Lorrie Hanson met me at the door on St. Patty's Day with green scones...and one shaped like a heart. I wasn't kidding about feeling loved!

I heart groundhog/gophers!

So....a groundhog IS a woodchuck....and a gopher is a gopher. Groundhogs live in our backyard, and? BABIES ARE OUT!! So today...setting up for the bbq...I came upon cute they were, and I love them. So yay. The background on my obsession is that every year, he-and yes, there is only one and he's always the same, anyway, he waddles out.....and to the nearest dandelion head....CHOMPS down on it...then stands to chew it....and his standing does two things....1. let's him chew and 2. let's him look around for his next treat! So then he RUNS to the next dandelion....CHOMP....STAND....RUN to the next! It's the coolest process in the world. LOVE IT! They are like otters on land! So...speaking of otters? I was just at the Shedd Aquarium in Chicago...which I love, and finally this time? No drama....and I got some time to chill and hang with the sea otters. I want one for my bathroom. No picture I take ever does them justice...but goodness they are SO CUTE! I mean they just primp and PLAY! Always cleaning....scratching...etc. Entertaining for sure....and weird! I mean can you imagine them on land? So...I kinda want one for my bathtub....and you cats know I'm not much of a pet person....but an otter? I might be in! I wonder if they make leashes.... Anyway, so...since I won't be getting an otter soon? This groundhog will have to do! Back to the I came across 2....they let me stare for a was instantly leery of me...and waddled off....the other....just kind of watched me...I don't think he was the smart one....but then figured since his brother went...he should he did, but he only got to the tree line, then turned around to poke his nose out again, then he saw me, and slowly turned around again and went further into the woods. So I turned the corner of the backyard to go in the backdoor? AND THERE HE WAS! Sitting there! And his face...his precious little face....was SCARED TO DEATH! If he'd been a baby rabbit? He'd have been "scared to death". So....there I between him and the woods...but since he's new to living...he doesn't know that he could bolt left and then get to the woods....he only knows straight! So now while I feel bad that I'm scaring him? I also want a picture...and I want to feed him....and I want to cuddle with him. I get my picture....I get mom to hand me some watermelon....and I throw it his way...he does nothing...he's too scared to be curious....and knows that his mom is gonna kill him if I don't. So I go to toss it closer. Then I just GO closer...the whole cuddle part? He kind of jumps at me....and growl BARKS!!! It was SO CUTE! And a little scary...I'm convinced he could hurt me a little! was just telling me a story about how a couple babies attacked my dad's feet and it was funny. He? Had on shoes and pants...and they were smaller....I had on capri's and flips! So....alright....I got my picture....I tried to feed you....and I tried to cuddle....missionS accomplished. I stepped aside....he didn't immediately move. But then mom said it best...give him a second and he is gonna take off at a certain point. So I had the video ready and THAT he did. What a hoot. I posted it down below so that you could enjoy as well. Just know that it's me screaming "mommy", not him...just in case you didn't know they didn't talk! You know his mom was watching...knowing I wouldn't hurt him, but she knew he needed to be taught a lesson about staying with his brothers and not wandering off! What fun that was. Sorry for scaring you little guy...but thanks for the fun pictures!!!

And for fun....some internet info...I have no idea what he is....I think a gopher...cuz they aren't that big? But some get pretty fat...and I have no idea if they hibernate or not. Anyway, so the following is stolen...there...will that cover the plagerism?

Q: What is the difference between a groundhog and a gopher?

A: The big groundhog is about 24 times heavier than the little gopher. The animals look somewhat similar, however, with short neck, legs, and tail.

The groundhog (also known as a "woodchuck" and "whistle pig") is a marmot — essentially, a giant North American ground squirrel. The gopher is, like the groundhog, a burrowing member of the rodent order but its closest living relatives are kangaroo rats and pocket mice.

The groundhog hibernates and the gopher does not. By the end of October, the groundhog descends into her hidden burrow beneath a stump or a rock, curls into a relaxed ball, slows her heart from 75 to 4 beats a minute, and drops her body temperature to that of her home. She is so far "asleep" that, even if we warm her, she needs several hours to waken.

Groundhog: species Marmota monax from the squirrel family, Sciuridae, order Rodentia

  • up to 13 pounds, 6 kg
  • head and body 20 inches(50 cm) long; tail 18 inches
  • found in eastern and central United States, across Canada, and into Alaska along forest edges abutting meadows, open fields, roads, and streams.
  • good swimmers, can climb tall shrubs and sizable trees
  • Gopher: any of 38 species from the family Geomyidae, order Rodentia

  • 0.5 pound (250 g)
  • head and body 6 inches (15 cm) long; tail 3 inches (8 cm)
  • range from southern Canada and the United States, south through Mexico and Central America, to northwestern Colombia. Found from coastal areas to above the timberline in high mountains.
  • two to three-year lifespan

  • Monday, May 26, 2008

    Lake Champlain...a new "Great Lake"?

    Oh Hysterical. So…I’m sitting in O’Hare…just sat down…break out my mac…and I know better….but I see anyway…is there free WiFi? I mean I know there can’t be…since there are signs all over…that it’s too good to be true. It is…freaking BOINGO spot…which is great for Bents…not for me…I can’t commit to that yet. So…now I am really questioning how Fitzy can claim this hot mess as her favorite airport? Also…on that note? I don’t really think the Sears Tower is that ugly….but I do agree that it is TOTAL crap to count the height with the towers…I mean really….it is like measuring your height with a top hat on. HYSTERICAL comparison. ANYWAY…so I sit down…break out the mac…as I do have work to do..and I hear it….corner of my ear…..”Are you from Chicago?” This…not directed at me…but the answer from the person was “No”…so now I’m really listening…since I am super nosey and if I can answer a question from a total stranger…I will…and I’ll love it! So…despite the answer being “No”…this guy proceeds to ask the question anyway…”yeah…that lake…what’s that lake that’s here…isn’t there like a big lake here?” The guy…who isn’t from Chicago…goes “Michigan?” But you’d have to hear it incredulously…cuz he wasn’t sure…since it was too easy…surely that wasn’t the lake he was talking about, but alas…it was. The guy, asker, is like…”Michigan? Yeah…sounds right….k…thanks”…so then they turn away to talk amongst themselves…and this? THIS is where the fun really starts. They say,” now what are the other ones? Well, Lake Champlain, yeah, Lake Champlain, um….Erie…yeah…Erie…and one more….we have Michigan….oh wait…SUPERIOR…yep…there are 5 of them.” I don’t really know where to start with this one…I was forced to put on my headset….maybe a little Josh Groban would be able to stifle the fit of giggles …and their voices. Can we talk about this? I mean I GET that I just did a few tours of Chi-town…I get that I’m a tour person for a living…but really? Did you never learn HOMES!? And so, okay, you have one of the lakes wrong….no biggie…but then you proceed to name 4 of them? Oh yeah wow! COME ON!!! So then…he dials out on his phone…which I cannot do the noise justice…but it was so loud that I was convinced it was the PA system that was dialing! Nope…him, thankfully….he didn’t have obnoxious cell phone voice…but I barely catch the part about how they, his wife, mom, and him just got back from Ireland, Britain, and France, and all I could think of was ….what poor soul had them on tour!!!!! LOL. Okay…so we’re good…I THINK! Until this happens…I am unintentionally catching bits and pieces in between songs. (LOVE JJ HELLER by the way…mad props to Aubs for hooking me up there! LOVE HER!) So…I hear…"no, we’re still on central time." Let’s do keep in mind we are waiting for non-stop to Newark. So…”mom” goes….."when do we switch? When we get home?" I turned the volume up stat. I can excuse the part of when he opens his laptop and asks me if the wifi is free…I say no…freaking boingo….I actually didn’t say that…I said no…you have to pay. He says oh…it used to be free, in NY it’s free. I put my headphones back on-I’m pretty sure that wifi in NY airports is never free with the exception of JetBlue terminal in JFK!…but all this not before “mom” says…so you can’t use it on the plane? This? This happening right now?? Regular riot. I’m tempted to take my headphones off…I mean…entertaining isn’t the word really. Awwwwwwwwwwww…they are leaving! They just made an announcement for “Passenger Mary Allen to recheck”…so they all got up, with their stuff and have headed off to the counter…..and someone stole their seat. Okay….well I’m done poking fun at seemingly nice strangers that think there are 4 great lakes and one of them being Lake Champlain. Look out Vermont…your lake just got stolen…and moved! You might want to ask him what lake he thinks Lake Champlain is....and steal that one! I wonder where poor forgotten Lake Ontario will end up.....! This picture? The Superheroes at Lake Champlain/Ontario/Tanganyika.

    Friday, May 23, 2008

    Legume shot #1...

    As you have read before..the peanut is NOT a nut. That little factoid was read to me by Annie...and it's since become this joke with us. I haven't seen her since training in Vermont (Shout out to my Super Heroes traveling to Europe sans ME this weekend...) so...anyway, I've been gone for 2 months....just got home last week...and to an envelope...from her. In it...was a little white box...and in that little white box....was....A PEANUT! An eraser peanut! She had bought it on her last trip with CAPITOL (whom we love love love) at the Field Museum-where Sue the T-Rex lives. It brought me to tears...I mean was I tired? But whatever! It was so funny, and sweet, and perfect! SO...since then...I've officially named this peanut "Annie" and it is traveling with me...and is becoming my Flat Stanley. So my first picture with Annie...the the White Sox-Indians game in Chicago! White Sox that was exciting...since I'm from group was from NY...huge loyal fans we are. HUGS!

    Thursday, May 22, 2008

    See Andy...

    So...I LOVE this blog about this I'm linking....go "Fix Me"'s fab. And thanks Andy for letting me steal it and link to it.

    Tuesday, May 20, 2008

    Dancing trees. driving to Target with Gayley...a tree caught my eye...and really made me laugh, and almost out loud. It was totally dancing! Not just any dancing though! You have to know the background, which could be impossible, but I'll try. We had training for work, you know that tour manager thing I do, and it was in Vermont for 2 weeks. It was great....see the huge house down below. Anyway, so at the end of the 2nd week, JCrom (our boss-who HATES nicknames, but for the sake of works!) had a birthday and was coming up to the house ON his birthday. So of course Annie says...."well, we have to make up a birthday dance" and just so matter of factly. It wasn't like "hey....we should make up a dance...right guys?" It was just like duh...of course we did. I love that nobody you have ever met. So....we do...we ended up doing it to "Blue" by Eiffel 65. So...we get some moves down....and then we get all peeps on board...which was a riot. whole point in the beginning? We all start bent over with our heads down...then we "swim" up? And this "swimming" is what the tree was TOTALLY doing! It wasn't "swaying" or "blowing" or anything! IT WAS SWIMMING! made me laugh, and it made my heart smile. So start to notice more...the wind doesn't make the trees makes them DANCE!

    Hundred Dollar Bill

    Sometimes...I'm just curious as to why we are so stupid. I mean seriously...God promises us so much more than we ever ever deserve....and we still fight with Him. I don't know...just how I feel. I was talking about it with a friend last night....and it's just true. We take things as our own, and we try to control it...and God just wants us to let it go so He can make it His...and better! Like I can't describe it...but you know what I'm talking about. It's like we have this hundred dollar bill in our pocket...which a hundred dollars? YAY...but the thing is? He wants us to give it back to that he can perfectly and infinitely MULTIPLY it, but yet....we hang on to that hundred dollar bill. And that hundred dollar bill? In the end? Will pay for not very much at all...but infinite multiples? Will pay for quite a lot. So why isn't it easy to give up? I mean it just makes sense! So..that's my current struggle...well, one of them.....letting it to Him...since it's not mine anyway. Grrrrr.

    Sunday, May 18, 2008


    My last post was April 4? And from training in Vermont? SORRY! So...just to re-cap briefly? Training was until April 13...on which day I flew home...after waiting a good 5.5 hours in the airport of Providence...watching at LEAST 4 planes fly right to Newark!!! Grr...tis how it rolls! Jackie and Linds picked me up....YAY! And somewhere else I'll blog about my flight's funny AND embarrassing! So...then I had ALL DAY Monday at NJ! Then I left Tuesday for Paris...with a VAGUE operating itinerary...and NO idea what to expect. (INSERT LONG BLOG ABOUT FRANCE TRIP HERE!) So then....flew back to Newark on the 27th of April...where Fousin Jaime and Cheri picked me up and took me home to Long Island...where I left half of my luggage...did some laundry and spent a good 3 hours sleeping on the couch! The next morning I headed off to JFK to fly down to DC for my "ride-along" for two days...then my own tour of DC for the next 3! Which...thank goodness it was a 3 bus move...I'd have died...too beat and too new to DC! So....our groups left on Friday the 2nd of May and I left early on the morning of the 3rd for be at cousin Steven's wedding...well, as much as I could anyway! I made the rehearsal....and rehearsal dinner! The next day...well...I saw where the wedding would be and salivated over some cupcakes! Then...I had to leave an hour before the wedding...:-( and off to the "Pacific NW"....for my "training tour"....and there I spent 8 days working my way from Portland to San Fran, via Coos Bay and Eureka....and then? I flew back to LA....spent a day with Tia Martha....GROOMING! I felt human after that day...and Tuesday...the 13th I flew BACK to NJ! And was home...with the Grunkies...and sleeping in my own bed!!!!! YAY! It is now Saturday night....Sunday morning actually...and I should be in bed...but I'm not....and all this to say...there is a HUGE pile of laundry outside my bedroom door..that HAUNTS I leave in 3 days for a trip to Chicago....(I heart Capitol!) and I need to do it....but here is what happens!? That pile? Is filled with weird colors....that have to be separated...and since I can't mentally process it? I keep stepping over it! AHHHHHH!!! So be it. 3 minuteted. I KNOW that is not a word...but I like it! So...there you have it....more to come...I'm sure. I mean I still have to tell you about the yogurt in my eye incident...or the man that just ate the center out of his pizza! I'm outty, but I leave you with a night view from my window at my hotel in Paris.....